Roadtrip

On Friday it was Anzac day or if you living over here 'Aac' day. It was a mandatory day off work which gave us the perfect opportunity to go on a road trip down the coast. We set out fairly late in the day and eventually ended up in 'Apollo Bay'. Its just like your typical coastal tourist town with one main road splattered with cafe and boutique stores. They had a music festival on throughout the weekend with local bars hosting bands. You had to pay something like $100 which gave you entrance to all the acts etc. Eventually we found a camping ground, brought ourselves a slab of beer and a bottle of whiskey and got absolutely slaughtered.

Todd, Simon, Whiskey!

Drunk DJ T-Fish

The next day we woke feeling like fucken' shit and decided one night was enough. I went to the toilet at the camping ground and found a 14-15 guy straightening his hair with hair straighteners. I wanted to kick his face. Whilst we tried to pack things up there was a schoolboys footy game being played beside the camping ground. It was hard to watch and included some poor player position decisions and one player wearing headgear. I couldn't quite understand that one. His jersey was too tight.

Just like any short man, he made up for it with his voice and bad attitude.

On the way home we stopped off at the 12 Apostles. It was raining and cold but it was worth seeing them plus it woke us up as we were starting to fade a bit.

The 12 Apostles

Sunday was another miserable day but we decided to go to Phillip Island anyway. Aside from super bikes Phillip Island is known for its penguins. We were all keen to see them but after seeing the price to watch them swim to shore we flagged the idea instead choosing to see Koalas.

We had a competition to see who could take the cutest picture.

Awww Tory

Meathead

The sound of meat when its had a hard weekend on the piss. Sorry patty, but your too far away to censor me.

Schoolgirl Racism

School girls in Australia are shocking, the amount of shit you have to hear them speak whilst on the tram is amazing. I dont think that they know the stuff they say is incredibly insulting and im sure most of the people that hear it dont think so either. It seems to be the norm. Racism in australia....? No such thing.

Busking

I went for a walk to the IGA (supermarket) yesterday to get a few things to eat. Sitting outside was a busker playing on his accoustic guitar and singing. Now im never happy giving money out to people, especially bums because their so demanding and aggressive, either getting right in you face whilst your having lunch or asking for ridiculous amounts of money. Its probably the shit i have to deal with regarding bums that effects me in hardly ever giving money to buskers. However yesterday was different once i heard what he was playing. To my surprise it was Skid Rows '18 and Life'. I immediatly pulled coins out of my pocket, threw them into the guitar bag at his feet and made my way through the supermarket doors. As i left he was playing some other shit i wasnt familiar with and lost all respect for him. It was probably U2 or something.

Patty was a young boy, He had a heart of stone.
Lived 9 to 5 and worked his fingers to the bone.
Just barely got out of school, came from the edge of town.
Fought like a switchblade so no one could take him down.
He had no money, oooh no good at home.
He walked the streets a soldier and he fought the world alone

Trollop

Pronunciation: \ˈträ-ləp\
Function: noun
Etymology: perhaps irregular from trull
Date: 1621
: a vulgar or disreputable woman; especially : one who engages in sex promiscuously or for money

Whats happening Mr. Bats you doppleganger?

What the hell is going on?


Since were doing lookalikes, heres one that some of you may have seen if you did the survey. Im desperate for material, re using old stuff. I remember walking home from the gym and seeing a prostitute that looked like the guy who played Saget in Street Fighter the movie.She didnt have an eye patch and i dont think she could do a fireball from a standing AND kneeling position but she may have had the scar running down her chest.

Celebrity Post: Mike!

I got an email today from Mike with a picture he wanted posted on the blog. Ofcourse i obliged him and here it is. If you know me the picture is pretty straight forward to understand but if your struggling, the picture is commenting on my ongoing struggle to grow a beard. 23yrs old and still cant grow a fucken' beard, what the fuck!!